Campfire Songs
Run by the Retired Scouter.

Retired Scouter Campfire Songs 


If I Were Not A Bright Girl Guide


If I were not a bright Girl Guide
Something else I'd rather be
If I were not a bright Girl Guide
A washer woman I would be
I'd be working all day long, singing this old song
Wishy-washy, wishy-washy hanging up the clothes
Wishy-washy, wishy-washy hanging up the clothes

If I were not a bright Girl Guide
Something else I'd rather be
If I were not a bright girl guide
A bus conductor I would be
I'd be working all day long, singing this old song
Move along there, move along there, no more room inside, ding!
Move along there, move along there, no more room inside, ding!
Wishy-washy, wishy-washy hanging up the clothes
Wishy-washy, wishy-washy hanging up the clothes

A secretary I would be
Taking shorthand, taking shorthand, sitting on the bosses knee, oh!
Taking shorthand, taking shorthand, sitting on the bosses knee, oh!
Move along there, move along there, no more room inside, ding!
Move along there, move along there, no more room inside, ding!
Wishy-washy, wishy-washy hanging up the clothes
Wishy-washy, wishy-washy hanging up the clothes

If I Were Not a . . . Scout
(This is the Music Concert)
Now I'm a Boy Scout, (or Girl Guide) as you can plainly see
But if I weren't a Boy Scout (or Girl Guide) . . .

A bird watcher I'd be
Hark a lark, flying through the park, SPLAT!

A plumber I would be
Plunge it, flush it, look out below!

A mermaid I would be
Bloop, bloop, bloop, bloop, bloop, bloop!

A carpenter I'd be
Two by four, nail it to the floor!

A secretary I'd be
z-z-z-z get the point, z-z-z-z get the point?

A teacher I would be
Sit down, shut up, throw away your gum!

An airline attendant I'd be
Coffee, tea, or me, sir; here's your little bag, BLEH!

A hippie I would be
Love and peace, my hair is full of grease!

A farmer I would be
Here's a cow, there's a cow, and here's another yuck!

A laundry worker I would be
Starchy here, starchy there, starchy in your underwear!

A cashier I would be
Twenty nine, forty nine, here is your change, sir!

A gym teacher I'd be
We must, we must, improve the bust!

A medic I would be
Turn around, drop your pants, jab, jab, jab!

A doctor I would be
Take a pill; pay my bill! I'm going golfing!

An electrician I would be
Positive, negative; turn on the juice-ZZZT!

A Preacher I would be
Well, well, you never can tell; you might go to heaven,
or you might go to hell!

A fireman I would be
Jump lady! Jump lady! Whoo-ooah! GOTCHA!

A cook I would be
Mix it, bake it; heartburn-BURP!

A ice cream maker I'd be
Tutti-frutti, tutti-fruitti, nice ice cream!

A politician I would be
Raise the taxes, lower the pay, vote for me on election day!

A butcher I would be
Chop it up, grind it up, make a little patty!

A garbage collector I'd be
Lift it, dump it, sort out the goodies!

A typist I would be
Ticka, ticka, ticka, ticka, ticka, ticka, ZING!

A [Domino's] pizza maker I'd be
30 minute, fast delivery!

A clam digger I would be
Dig one here, dig one there-Oh my frozen derriere!

Superman I would be
It's a bird, it's a plane, where is Lois Lane?

Lois Lane I would be
Get away, get away, get away, Clark Kent!

A cyclist I would be
peddle, peddle, peddle, peddle; ring, ring, ring!

A truck driver I'd be
Here's a curve, there's a curve. HERE'S A BETTER CURVE!
Makes outline of shapely woman

A house cleaner I'd be
Ooh, a bug; squish it in the rug!

A baby [toddler] I would be
Mama, Dada, I wuv you!